Never let anyone steal your joy.
Have you ever read that statement or heard it said in a conversation or from a stage at a convention? I’ve been thinking a lot about personal happiness, joy and the impact others have on us. You should never allow another person to hold that much power over you or your emotional well being.
While it is true you control your own happiness, there are those who would try and steal that joy or happiness from you. They are like emotional vampires that want to suck your joy from you. Whether that is because they are so miserable and adhere to the “misery loves company” strategy of life, or whether they feel if they take your joy, it will make them joyful I don’t know.
When I was reading my Bible and saying prayers this morning, Stormie O’Martian reminded me that forgiveness is paramount to maintaining your sense of joy.
For me that was a nudge from God telling me no matter who, how, or why someone is mistreating you, going out of their way to make you miserable, trying to punish you, it is up to you whether or not your happiness and your joy will be destroyed.
If we instead focus on seeing the other person as a child of God, who is damaged, forgiven and loved by Him, then is it too much to ask that we also forgive that person, even if they don’t ask for forgiveness?
I find joy in my relationship with God and with my children. I find joy in my pets and being in nature. My joy does not come from whether or not another person likes or dislikes me. That would be self-centered and egotistical.
I make a choice to love others and Christ loves me. Even if it means that person does not want my forgiveness and love, I am required by my faith to forgive and love them anyway.
Friends, whoever it is that is trying to steal your inner peace, your happiness, your joy, you have the power to say no. Not today. Not ever. I am a child of God and I love you and forgive you.
We don’t do that for the other person’s soul, we do it for our own. There is peace in forgiveness. There is rest in love.
It does not make what the other person does to you right. It sets you free to be happy despite their actions.
Have a blessed day.
* Sometimes when I need an extra boost of joy, I like to put a few drops of Young Living’s Joy on my neck and wrists. You can learn more about Young Living oils HERE.
Last night I had dinner with three women who I don’t get to see very often, but are very important to me. We used to live on the same street together years ago and one by one, all but one of us moved away.
I moved to that neighborhood when my daughter was 2 and was welcomed by the three of them with open arms. Their daughters babysat my children, they were shoulders to cry on and support I relished.
We don’t get together that often, but when we do, it is like a salve to my soul.
As we were talking last night, we all agreed that everyone has problems. As one of my friend’s put it, “Every single one of my friends is going through horrible times. They are just different times.”
And she’s right. Someone could be dealing with marital issues. Another could be dealing with health issues. Another one may be having problems with their children, their finances, or a combination of all of them. One of my friends recently lost her niece to murder.
Many people keep what they going through bottled up inside, but it is important to realize the benefits of talking to someone about what you are dealing with on a daily basis.
You want to know one of the best shows that highlights what friendship between women is all about? Sex and the City. I firmly believe one of the reasons that show was so popular was the support and friendship between the four main characters was so inspiring. Who wouldn’t want to be within that circle of love and acceptance, despite their personality differences?
As most of you know, I am taking classes toward a Doctor of Naturopathy degree. We believe that everything effects the body, including your emotions and stress. When you keep your emotions bottled up inside and don’t get them out, it can and will adversely effect your health.
That is why it is so important to maintain friendships and to nourish those relationships so you can keep balance in your life.
Some of the ways being with friends can help you:
1. Mental Health
2. Curb Loneliness
3. Provides Comfort
4. Partners in Crime
5. A Shoulder To Cry On
9. Unconditional Love
10. Laughter (which is the BEST medicine!)
If it’s been a while since you’ve gotten together with friends for a night of fun and laughter, now is the time to give the a call and make plans.
Don’t wait. Life is meant to be enjoyed and it’s meant to be enjoyed with friends.
The other week I finally took the plunge to make the greatest whipped body butter you will ever try!
What makes it the best?
Not only does it use moisturizing ingredients like Shea and Cocoa Butter, but I also added in essential oils from the world leader in essential oils, Young Living!
You can always add in the essential oils of your choice; however, since my skin has a lot of damage from all those years I spent baking myself to a deep, dark tan in my youth, I decided my skin needed some extra support. Therefore, I chose to use Young Living’s Frankincense, Sacred Frankincense and Lavender in my mixture.
This recipe made enough for both me and my daughter to use.
Here’s my recipe:
The BEST Whipped Body Butter Recipe
1/2 cup Coconut Oil
1/2 cup Shea Butter
1/2 cup Cocoa Butter
4 oz. Jojoba Oil
30 drops each of the Essential Oils (I used Young Living’s Frankincense, Sacred Frankincense and Lavender).
I melted the first 3 ingredients in a glass bowl over a simmering pot of water, then let it cool on the island. After it was cool to the touch, I added in the essential oils, then put it in the refrigerator until it was solid (not hard). Take out your hand mixer and whip it up until it looks like frosting.
I keep mine in a glass jar and apply on wet skin when I get out of the bath or shower, then blot dry.
This body butter smells so good, you might be tempted to eat it. Don’t do that. You will love the way it makes your skin feel and look!
Have a blessed day!
I’m sure you’ve heard of that saying before, “Don’t be afraid to let go of the good to get to the great!”
What does it mean?
For me, it means that don’t get so comfortable with ordinary that you are afraid to reach for the extraordinary. Don’t be afraid to step outside your comfort zone and go for what you really want, even if the life you have right now is comfortable.
I have heard people say, “I would really like … but I have a nice house, a family and a good job. I don’t need anything else. I’m okay.”
I’m not sure we were put on this earth to just be okay. I think God gave each of us a talent and that it is up to us to push ourselves to become all that we were meant to be. To use our talents to do great things for His glory.
We aren’t meant to just survive. We are meant to thrive.
I have watched on Facebook many of my Diamond friends from Young Living experience a thriving existence in Hawaii. One of them has spent the last 3 weeks there in paradise. She arrived a week before the retreat, stayed through the Young Living retreat and is now enjoying another week.
It is my hope that one day I will join them on these Diamond trips as I introduce others to a happier, healthier and more abundant life.
Yes, it’s uncomfortable to approach strangers, to call people, to do classes. However, if you look at it from the prospective that you are helping others achieve their goals, then the journey becomes a lot less frightening.
Whatever your dream is, whatever goal you may have set for yourself at some point, then abandoned, I want you to know that it’s never too late. You can live a better life.
Don’t get so caught up in a comfortable life, that you settle for less than what you want.
Have a blessed day.
“You are exactly where you are in life because that is exactly where you see yourself.” – Gloria Mayfield Banks
A friend of mine posted this quote on Facebook this morning and it really struck a chord with me. It’s the sort of quote that kind of knocks you off your feet when you think about it.
It makes you question everything about your life, your circumstances and your future.
You are where you are, because that is where you believe you should be. It all goes back to what you are telling yourself about who you are and what you deserve … or what you DON’T deserve.
Mind blowing thoughts, right?
You are not a product of your circumstances, or life, or anything else that you might want to tell yourself. If you are in debt, broke, fat, unfit, etc. you are in that place because this is what you believe about yourself. It is what you fill your mind with on a daily basis.
For example, I have been saying I want to be healthier and get fit; however, I have not been putting forth the consistent effort to make that a reality. Like many people, I start out with good intentions, but I falter. I have the unhealthy food, I CHOOSE not to exercise.
Why is that? Why do we make choices that sabotage our goals?
In short, it’s because in our subconscious we do not see ourselves as healthy and fit, so we make choices to support that vision of ourselves that we hold onto very tightly.
We know we should choose the salad instead of the burger, yet we choose the burger. We know we should exercise every day, yet we choose not to. We make choices to support our internal vision of ourselves.
It’s not just weight loss or fitness. It’s money. It’s success. It’s career advancement. You are precisely where you find yourself, because deep down, that is where you believe you belong.
You don’t believe you deserve a debt-free life, a nicer car, a career you love and/or a spouse who loves and supports you.
Because of what you believe in the deepest, most secretive places of your mind, you make choices to support that belief about yourself. Your mind seeks to reaffirm the thoughts you have about yourself.
I have studied positive thinking for many, many years and the more I have studied it, the more I am convinced that your thoughts are more powerful than you can even begin to imagine.
I believe we should take time each day to really visualize the life we want for ourselves and reaffirm it daily. Our daily choices will reflect what our minds tell us we are.
Fill your mind with positive images about yourself and your life and soon, your mind will help you make the choices you need to succeed.
Have a blessed day.
I was listening to Darren Hardy’s Darren Daily last week and he relayed a story about how he was constantly chasing his father’s approval until the day he realized he would never receive his father’s approval.
It didn’t matter how successful he got, or what achievements he reached, it was never good enough for his father. He always found fault. He stated that when he realized that, it was the most devastating and freeing moments of his life. Because at that point, he stopped living trying to be successful for his father and he started to ask himself what success meant to him.
Which brings me to today’s blog post.
What goal are you chasing and is it the right goal for you? Are you chasing a goal because it’s someone else’s dream life? Is it for money? For fame? For recognition? For acceptance? Or, are you chasing a goal because it lights a fire under you and makes you excited to get out of bed each day?
Your why makes a huge difference in whether or not you will achieve it. Why? Because if your why isn’t strong enough, it will allow you to make excuses and procrastinate.
A strong why, will push you through the bad times and uphill battles. It will see you through the times when you just don’t want to do it anymore.
If you are striving for approval from someone else and doing everything you can to please them and reach a goal you believe they have set for you, you will never be happy. You must look inside yourself and ask, “What makes me happy?”
If your idea of happiness is living in a small shack on the beach and being able to surf every day, then working yourself to death to buy a mansion and a $100,000 car will never make you happy.
If you love animals and your idea of happiness is living on a ranch or a farm surrounded by horses, chickens, dogs and cats, living in an apartment in New York City is probably not the right thing for you, even if it’s your parents’ vision of success.
Whatever it is that you envision for yourself, make sure it is truly your vision and not someone else’s idea of what success looks like.
And don’t get me wrong here, if your idea of success is living in a 15,000 square foot mansion in Beverly Hills and driving a $500,000 car, then by all means, that is your goal and you should go for it.
Gary Vaynerchuk wants to by a billion dollar football team. That’s something that gets him fired up. I hope he reaches his goal, but that goal is not for me.
Sit down and think about what your dream life would look like. Really, allow yourself to dream, then adjust your goals and get to work making that dream a reality.
Have a blessed day.
Are you afraid of trying new things?
I’ve blogged about facing your fears before on here, but do you know that being afraid of trying something new can prevent you from living life to the fullest? It’s true!
I have a bucket list of things I want to do before I die and one of those things is learn to surf. I haven’t done that yet, mostly because I live in a land-locked state and the ability to take lessons and get out on the waves regularly is very limited. That will change hopefully in 2017 if not sooner.
I had another thing on my bucket list and that was to take out a stand up paddle board (SUP). That has become very popular lately and I thought, “This could be a baby step in learning how to surf down the road.”
Yesterday, I got my chance. We were on a lake and at first, my husband and I started out on kayaks while the kids took out the stand up paddle boards to have some fun. As I traveled around the, I looked at how much fun they were having and after about 30 minutes, I turned my kayak back to shore and asked the many in charge if I could try a stand up paddle board.
The first thing he asked me was, “How’s your balance?” I told him I had good balance, and he responded, “Then you should be fine.” He told me to start on my knees as he pushed the board out into the water. Once I was adrift on the water, I laid my paddle across the front of the board, got on my feet and stood up. Surprisingly, it was much sturdier than I thought it would be.
I told him I would probably just paddle around close to the shore since this was my first time, but I ended up paddling out to where my kids were.
This was just another instance of how, if I listened to my inner fear, I would have missed out on a fun experience, one I intend to do a lot more of!
This is why we should remind ourselves constantly to try new things, even when they seem a little scary. You may find you don’t like or enjoy it. And that’s fine! However, you owe it to yourself to find out.
Whether it’s trying a new food, a new sport or something new for your business, let yourself experience all that you can.
Learn, grow and have a blessed life!
Do you have a dream? I mean really. Do you have a passionate life goal that you constantly think about, dream about, work for?
You would be surprised by the number of people who have stopped dreaming, stopped believing in their dreams or the life they want to be living. Life has either beaten them down until they gave up, or they never really allowed themselves to dream.
Sometimes the only time people dream about a great and fabulous life is when they buy a lottery ticket and start fantasizing about what they’re going to do with all of that money.
Why is that? Why is it that so many people don’t dream anymore? When you’re young, you believe you can do and be anything you want and you know what? You were right. But sometime, somewhere, someone, maybe even your own mind, convinced you that it was impossible to be or do what you wanted and so you gave up.
If you are like me and have not given up on living the life of your dreams, here are 10 quick tips:
1. Don’t give into the fear – I believe this is possibly the number one thing that keeps people from living the life they want. Fear. It’s probably the dirtiest four letter word in existence. It holds people back. It convinces them not to try new things or attempt the seemingly impossible. Don’t give into it. The dirty secret fear holds is that when it’s confronted, it tends to diminish. One of my favorite quotes from Jon Acuff is, “When I become brave, I’ll let you know. Until then, I’m just going to do a lot of awesome things scared out of my mind.”
2. Make the right choices – We make hundreds of choices every day. Choose to make decisions that will inch you closer to your dreams, whether that is weight loss, fitness, health, finances, living somewhere new, etc. Every choice has a consequence. Choose wisely.
3. Talk positively to yourself – Every time a negative thought pops into your head, immediately stop it. I have heard some success coaches actually say out loud, “Delete that!” and then verbally replace that negative thought with a positive one. It may make you feel silly at first, but the mind is powerful. Make sure you are using it to your advantage.
4. Live a life of no regrets – My husband and I were listening to a Brian Tracy CD once and one question he said to ask yourself every day has stuck with us ever since. That question was this, “What one thing, if you did it today, would help you reach your goals?” Do that.
5. Don’t shy away from hard work – Many people use the excuse that they are too tired to work on their dreams. That’s baloney. Your dreams should be so big that they scare you and excite you all at the same time. Jim Rohn said to tell yourself, “I’m working full-time on my job and part-time on my fortune because profits lead to fortune.” Can you spare 10 to 15 hours a week to work on your fortune?
6. Live like you are already successful – In other words, ask yourself what does success feel like? What does success smell like? Wear the perfume. What does success look like? Dress the part. Go where successful people go and do what successful people do. I once worked for a man who was a multi-millionaire entrepreneur. He was working as a CPA for someone else and decided he was going to open his own CPA firm. He bought an expensive suit, leased an expensive car and went knocking on doors asking companies for their business. Within 5 years, he not only had a very successful CPA business, but he owned 10 other businesses as well and lived in the mansion of his dreams on a beautiful estate. He told me, “You have to act, look and believe you are a success and success will come to you.”
7. Kick down doors – If a door is closed, kick it down (figuratively, not literally). In other words, if there’s a roadblock in your way, figure out a way under, over, around or through it. Don’t give up. Water can wear a hole in a rock over time, not because of it’s power, but because of it’s persistence. Keep going.
8. Make yourself stand out from the crowd – Don’t strive to be like everyone else. Strive to be yourself. Nothing is as powerful as being you. If you do what everyone else is doing, you’ll get the same results as everyone else. If you strive to do what the successful people are doing, guess what? You’ll get those same results. Strive to be exceptional.
9. Share your gifts with others – Spread the wealth. Teach others what you know. Serve them. You will be surprised to find that the more you give, the more you get.
10. Allow yourself to dream big – Don’t talk yourself out of the future you want for yourself. Allow yourself to not only dream, but dream big, amazing things for yourself. Then set goals and get to work on achieving them.
You can live the life you’ve always dreamed of, you just have to believe you can and get to work on making it happen.