Sherry A. Phillips

Suspense Author

Face Your Fears

th 6

Yesterday I was on a writing website and the writer of the blog post mentioned that she was faced with wanting to attend a Pitchfest but could never seem to get there.

Every year there was some excuse or “I can’t” reason for not attending.

Her therapist asked her pointedly, “Is it a matter of ‘I can’t’ or ‘I don’t want to’?”

The word can’t states that you quite literally are unable to do something.

In most instances, it is usually a case of ‘I don’t want to.’

Most of us get frustrated with the obstacles life throws our way. Life can give us great excuses for why we are not accomplishing the things we want to. Time, money, children, spouses, work, stress, etc. are all things we use to explain why we just ‘can’t’ do something that we know we should do to achieve our goals.

When we use the “I can’t” excuse, what we usually really mean is “I don’t want to.”

And most of the time, when you don’t want to do something, it stems from fear.

What are you afraid of? What is it that is making you so uncomfortable that you are unwilling to even try?

Most of us are more comfortable sitting at home with that sickening knot tied in our stomach, than we are in exploring why the knot is there to begin with.

No matter what it is you are trying to accomplish, someone has been exactly where you are and they were just as uncertain and just as afraid as you are. What set them apart was their willingness to push through the knot of fear and forge ahead anyway.

You have to learn how to fall, get back up and become stronger for your efforts.

Some of the conversations we have in our head go along the lines of:

What if they say no?
What if they laugh at me?
What if they think I’m an idiot?
What if I fail?

Your response to all of those questions and any others that your fearful mind conjures should be “So what?”

Failure is not final. Learn from it and move on.

You CAN do anything you set your mind to. The secret is to believe in yourself, face your fears, persevere and never give up.

The only way to defeat fear is to face it. I have had to confront this in my own life. I have sat around with good intentions of what I was “going to do.” Usually that meant a lot of preparation and not a lot of action.

Not anymore. I will face my fears, because now I know it is not so much a matter of “I can’t” and more like, “I don’t want to.”

Face your fears and be great today!

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